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Patrick Redford Patrick Redford Oct 28, 2019. 15 comments

Sergiño Dest Announces He Will Play For USMNT

Sergiño Dest Announces He Will Play For USMNT

The USMNT is currently looking like wet slop , Gregg Berhalter seems like a bad coach, and, until last weekend , Christian Pulisic was not earning as much playing time as he wanted over at Chelsea. It has been a bad month all told, especially with the future of the program’s best dual national suddenly up for grabs. Sergiño Dest ominously declined a USMNT call-up earlier this month,...

15 Comments

Patrick Redford Patrick Redford Oct 26, 2019. 12 comments

Mizzou Athletics Tweet Celebrating Its Student-Athletes' Diversity Goes Horribly Wrong

Mizzou Athletics Tweet Celebrating Its Student-Athletes' Diversity Goes Horribly Wrong

On Wednesday, the University of Missouri’s athletic department contributed its part to the NCAA’s inclusion week (which runs for less than an actual week, naturally), and boy was it crummy. Photos of several of their athletes explaining why they are “more than a student athlete.” The messages displayed in front of the beaming athletes were markedly different between black and white students:

...

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Patrick Redford Patrick Redford Oct 26, 2019. 11 comments

Novelist Kelsey McKinney: The patrickredford.kinja.com Interview

Novelist Kelsey McKinney: The patrickredford.kinja.com Interview

Kelsey McKinney, a features writer at our sister site Deadspin, announced today that her debut novel, God Spare The Girls, will be published at some point in the future by The Book Group. Kelsey, a fellow medium , is a friend to patrickredford.kinja.com, and she was gracious enough to grant patrickredford.kinja.com an exclusive first interview with the soon-to-be world famous author.

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Patrick Redford Patrick Redford Oct 26, 2019. 5 comments

Patrick Beverley Mercilessly Taunts Warriors Fans After Clippers Ruin New Arena's Opening Night

Patrick Beverley Mercilessly Taunts Warriors Fans After Clippers Ruin New Arena's Opening Night

Kawhi Leonard and the Clippers opened up the Warriors’ shiny new San Francisco arena by hanging 141 points on the hapless Dubs. That’s the most in almost a decade. Golden State looked terribly thin, with D’Angelo Russell and Draymond Green both posting plus-minus lines of -35 and Green admitting that “we fucking sucked.” The Clippers, meanwhile, needed just 21 minutes from Leonard to coast to...

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Patrick Redford Patrick Redford Oct 25, 2019. 6 comments

Giannis Antetokounmpo Denies Giving Juicy Quote To Harvard Business School About Possibly Leaving Bucks

Giannis Antetokounmpo Denies Giving Juicy Quote To Harvard Business School About Possibly Leaving Bucks

Because he’s the reigning MVP, because he plays in Milwaukee, and because the 2019 summer was defined by NBA stars switching teams—one of whom previously and publicly talked about how he wanted to stay—Giannis Antetokounmpo will face intense scrutiny over his forthcoming free agency decision in 2021 until he signs what will surely be the largest contract in the history of the league. He’s...

6 Comments

Patrick Redford Patrick Redford Oct 25, 2019. 10 comments

Yu Darvish Waited Over A Year To Get Justin Verlander Back For A Joke

Yu Darvish Waited Over A Year To Get Justin Verlander Back For A Joke

While chasing down a slow grounder in Game 2 of the World Series, Astros pitcher Justin Verlander fell on his butt as he threw the ball off his shin. Nobody was hurt; it was just a nice blooper.

More importantly, it allowed Cubs hurler Yu Darvish to hop in out of nowhere and get revenge against Verlander for a year-and-a-half old tweet. The gag started when Yu slipped while rounding second...

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Patrick Redford Patrick Redford Oct 25, 2019. 17 comments

Good Luck Getting Through The Sixers' Forest Of Arms

Good Luck Getting Through The Sixers' Forest Of Arms

Sixers rookie Matisse Thybulle had three points, one rebound, and one assist in 22 minutes during his NBA debut Wednesday night, and yet he received a glowing postgame interview on the arena floor after his team beat the Celtics on opening night. Why? Because he threw sand in the gears of his opponents’ offense whenever he was on the floor.

Thybulle bullied C’s guard Kemba Walker into...

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Patrick Redford Patrick Redford Oct 24, 2019. 9 comments

Feast Your Eyes On This Unholy, Perfect Goal

Feast Your Eyes On This Unholy, Perfect Goal

Every soccer player probably dreams about hitting a ball as perfectly as Marcel Sabitzer did today against Zenit. Not only did the Austrian uncork this breathtaking outside-boot curler in an actual game, the goal wound up winning RB Leipzig a Champions League group stage match. Look at the devilish outside-in bend on this beauty and tell me he could have smacked this one any better.

In other...

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Patrick Redford Patrick Redford Oct 24, 2019. 5 comments

Inside The NBA Desk Argues About Daryl Morey And The League's Standoff With China

Inside The NBA Desk Argues About Daryl Morey And The League's Standoff With China

Before the NBA’s season opener Tuesday night, the Inside The NBA crew discussed the ongoing feud between the NBA and the Chinese government for a good nine minutes. In the Free Speech corner: Kenny Smith. In the Be Nice To China corner: Ernie Johnson and Charles Barkley. In a third corner: Shaq.

Shaq was a bit all over the place with his thoughts. He stuck up strongly for Morey and...

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Patrick Redford Patrick Redford Oct 24, 2019. 6 comments

The Nose Speed Record Captures Alex Honnold And Tommy Caldwell's Fight Against El Capitan, Gravity, And Time

The Nose Speed Record Captures Alex Honnold And Tommy Caldwell's Fight Against El Capitan, Gravity, And Time

El Capitan was first climbed by Warren Harding, Wayne Merry, and George Whitmore in 1958. They climbed The Nose route over the course of a year, and it took them 47 days of actual climbing to reach the summit using “siege” tactics. In the intervening six decades, The Nose has established itself as the most famous big wall route in the entire world, in the process transforming from a...

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Patrick Redford Patrick Redford Oct 21, 2019. 18 comments

Chargers Lose In Humiliating Fashion After Melting Down On The Goal Line

Chargers Lose In Humiliating Fashion After Melting Down On The Goal Line

The Los Angeles Chargers looked all set to capture a dramatic win in Tennessee this afternoon, only to lose on one of the most bizarre, painful sequences you’ll see all year. The franchise has mastered losing in idiotic ways , and the final sequence of today’s 23-20 was the apotheosis of that trend.

Philip Rivers drove his team into the red zone in the final minutes of the game, and he seemed...

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Patrick Redford Patrick Redford Oct 21, 2019. 19 comments

That Was Classic Aaron Rodgers

That Was Classic Aaron Rodgers

Davante Adams did not play for the Packers today. Marquez Valdes-Scantling and Geronimo Allison were both on snap restrictions against the Raiders after suffering injuries against the Lions on Monday night. Aaron Rodgers was not only without his full arsenal of receivers today against the Raiders; his team came into the game on a short week after playing on Monday. The Raiders are feisty, and...

19 Comments

Patrick Redford Patrick Redford Oct 21, 2019. 9 comments

Andy Dalton Finds New, Miserable Low With Three Picks In Five Plays

Andy Dalton Finds New, Miserable Low With Three Picks In Five Plays

The piece of shit Bengals got pantsed at home today by Gardner Minshew and the Jaguars, coughing up a narrow, early fourth-quarter lead and allowing Jacksonville to coast to a double-digit win. They are now 0-7. Nobody went to the game. Joe Mixon had 10 rushes for two yards, and non-QB rushers combined for 16 attempts for zero yards. Grocery bags have become headwear.

But nobody had a worse...

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Patrick Redford Patrick Redford Oct 21, 2019. 12 comments

Video Surfaces Of Wild Brawl Between Nuggets' Malik Beasley And Former Bronco Su'a Cravens

Video Surfaces Of Wild Brawl Between Nuggets' Malik Beasley And Former Bronco Su'a Cravens

Today, TMZ Sports published security camera footage from an upscale Denver apartment that was taken on August 9 and shows two Denver athletes getting into a heavy brawl. The video shows a shirtless Malik Beasley pacing around the lobby before NFL safety Su’a Cravens, who was cut by the Broncos three weeks after this fight, enters and immediately starts swinging with Beasley. The fight went to...

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Patrick Redford Patrick Redford Oct 16, 2019. 15 comments

Enormous Dog Rescued After Hiking Too Much

Enormous Dog Rescued After Hiking Too Much

This is Floyd. He weighs 190 pounds. He is safe now.

Thank the Salt Lake County Sheriff’s Search and Rescue team for Floyd’s good health. According to SLCOSAR’s shockingly well-maintained Facebook page, rescuers were called Sunday night when hikers reported seeing a man and his gigantic dog unable to move on the trail near Grandeur Peak. They hiked about two miles in, bundled Floyd up onto a...

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Patrick Redford Patrick Redford Oct 08, 2019. 13 comments

Let Me Explain This Hilarious Cycling Scandal To You

Let Me Explain This Hilarious Cycling Scandal To You

Let us now chronicle the rise and sort-of fall of British YouTuber and now-former national e-cycling champion Cameron Jeffers. Unfortunately, the nouns in this story do not become that much easier to understand as we proceed, but please bear with me.

The story begins in March, when Jeffers won the first-ever British virtual racing national championship. The race was broadcast on BT Sport, and...

13 Comments

Patrick Redford Patrick Redford Oct 08, 2019.

Israel Adesanya Is The Next Big Thing

Israel Adesanya Is The Next Big Thing

Two years ago on this very website, Dr. Patrick Wyman wrote about the single most important question facing the UFC: where is the next generation of stars? It’s been a rough search, but last weekend, I think we finally found a great candidate.

Dozens of elite fighters have risen up the ranks since 2017, and while a few of them have emerged as new champions in their weight classes, nobody...

Patrick Redford Patrick Redford Oct 05, 2019. 18 comments

California HS Cancels Football Season After Four Players Cited For Sexual Battery Of Teammate

California HS Cancels Football Season After Four Players Cited For Sexual Battery Of Teammate

The Gilroy (Calif.) High School Mustangs have canceled the rest of the varsity football season in the wake of an accusation of locker room sexual assault. According to the San Jose Mercury News, Gilroy Police opened an investigation last week after a varsity player complained to administrators that he had been sexually assaulted by multiple teammates in the locker room after a practice.

The...

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Patrick Redford Patrick Redford Oct 04, 2019. 14 comments

Cyclist Punches Competitor In Head During Live TV Interview

Cyclist Punches Competitor In Head During Live TV Interview

The road cycling season is basically done and dusted, with the world championships wrapped up and the cyclocross world cup kicking off. There are still a few races going on, however, which brings us to the Sparkassen Münsterland Giro. It’s a race in Germany that I was not aware of until this week, and I only became aware of it because a guy punched another guy.

Deceuninck-QuickStep lead-out...

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Patrick Redford Patrick Redford Oct 04, 2019. 9 comments

Report: The Sparks Imploded Because Derek Fisher Is An Overmatched Dingus Who Can't Handle Criticism

Report: The Sparks Imploded Because Derek Fisher Is An Overmatched Dingus Who Can't Handle Criticism

The Los Angeles Sparks’ 2019 season ended in ignominious fashion, as they were swept by the Connecticut Sun while their best player, Candace Parker, inexplicably sat on the bench for almost an entire half of a closeout game. After the loss, Parker raised an eyebrow toward her head coach Derek Fisher for his strange tactics, since he also rested the team’s top scorers, Nneka Ogwumike and...

9 Comments