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Lauren Theisen Lauren Theisen Oct 29, 2019. 5 comments

I'm Not Saying The Broncos Put A Hit Out On Joe Flacco, But...

I'm Not Saying The Broncos Put A Hit Out On Joe Flacco, But...

This is all pretty suspicious, no? After last week’s Denver Broncos loss, wide receiver Emmanuel Sanders said, among other criticisms, “We need to call better plays.” He then quickly disappeared off the team in a trade with San Francisco. Now, after the Broncos lost again on Sunday in a heartbreaker to the Colts, and QB Joe Flacco publicly fumed about the 2-6 team’s cowardice in its late-game...

5 Comments

Lauren Theisen Lauren Theisen Oct 28, 2019. 2 comments

Even When Aaron Rodgers Slips Up, He's Spectacular

Even When Aaron Rodgers Slips Up, He's Spectacular

Even with Patrick Mahomes stuck on the sideline, Sunday night’s game between the Chiefs and the Packers played out as an entertaining battle of offenses that kept matching each other blow for blow. But in a fight between the recently un-retired Matt Moore and the god Aaron Rodgers, it was only a matter of time before the latter gained the edge. That happened on a Packers TD at the beginning...

2 Comments

Lauren Theisen Lauren Theisen Oct 28, 2019. 5 comments

Deadspin Up All Night: We May Still Have Time

Deadspin Up All Night: We May Still Have Time

Thank you for continuing to support Deadspin. Make the rest of your weekend count.

5 Comments

Lauren Theisen Lauren Theisen Oct 28, 2019. 5 comments

Deshaun Watson Got Kicked In The Frickin' Eye And Still Threw A Touchdown

Deshaun Watson Got Kicked In The Frickin' Eye And Still Threw A Touchdown

Texans QB Deshaun Watson can get you out of your seat at a moment’s notice , but he might have outdone himself while throwing a go-ahead fourth quarter touchdown in his team’s game against the Raiders on Sunday.

Watson dropped back with his team down four and facing first-and-goal with six-and-a-half minutes to go. On this incredible play, Watson didn’t just avoid what looked like a near...

5 Comments

Lauren Theisen Lauren Theisen Oct 28, 2019. 5 comments

The Broncos Played Like Cowards And Joe Flacco Is Pissed

The Broncos Played Like Cowards And Joe Flacco Is Pissed

Jacoby Brissett once again proved himself to be a trustworthy starter on Sunday, leading his Colts to a 5-2 record with a 15-13 late comeback win against the Broncos. Adam Vinatieri got the points that notched the victory, but it was Brissett who made one of the weekend’s best plays anywhere on a football field this weekend, escaping a sack and finding T.Y. Hilton way down the field to begin...

5 Comments

Lauren Theisen Lauren Theisen Oct 28, 2019. 15 comments

Max Scherzer Can't Go Tonight, So The Nationals Are Turning To, Um, Joe Ross?

Max Scherzer Can't Go Tonight, So The Nationals Are Turning To, Um, Joe Ross?

What was going to be a marquee Game 5 pitching rematch on Sunday night between the Astros’ Gerrit Cole and the Nationals’ Max Scherzer has taken a bizarre left turn, as Scherzer won’t be healthy enough to get on the mound for Washington. In a shock announcement this afternoon, manager Davey Martinez said his best starter was struggling with spasms in the neck/back area.

Scherzer will be...

15 Comments

Lauren Theisen Lauren Theisen Oct 28, 2019. 8 comments

The Bears Missed A Field Goal To Lose A Game

The Bears Missed A Field Goal To Lose A Game

The Chicago Bears have some *ahem* history with missed field goals , and the failure of Cody Parkey in last season’s playoffs clearly haunted the psyche of coach Matt Nagy all summer . But while this miss—by replacement kicker Eddy Pineiro to lose 17-16 against the Chargers—may not be as significant as a Wild Card loss to the Eagles, it’s still dangerously retraumatizing for anyone who lived...

8 Comments

Lauren Theisen Lauren Theisen Oct 28, 2019. 1 comments

Bears Fans Boo Team Off The Field After Offense Freezes At The Goal Line

Bears Fans Boo Team Off The Field After Offense Freezes At The Goal Line

Is this football? I think it’s supposed to be football, but what I’m seeing is an especially glitchy game of Madden I need to turn off and turn back on again. And the fans in Chicago seem to agree with me. Heading into halftime against the Chargers, down 7-6 with 45 seconds remaining in the quarter, the Chicago Bears had six opportunities to score from inside the five-yard line, including...

1 Comments

Lauren Theisen Lauren Theisen Oct 28, 2019. 11 comments

Flea Flickers Are Out. Double Reverse Flea Flickers Are In.

Flea Flickers Are Out. Double Reverse Flea Flickers Are In.

Yeah, sure, it’s possible for a team to score a touchdown on a boring old flea flicker, but if you could jazz things up by scoring on an Ultra Spectacular Jet Sweep Double Flea Flicker Reverse™️ instead, why wouldn’t you? That’s what the Rams were clearly thinking today in England against the Bengals, as they took a 17-10 lead with a play straight out of the Big 12. After one handoff, one...

11 Comments

Lauren Theisen Lauren Theisen Oct 27, 2019. 5 comments

5 Comments

Lauren Theisen Lauren Theisen Oct 27, 2019. 5 comments

Even Knicks Fans Already Love Tacko Fall

Even Knicks Fans Already Love Tacko Fall

The “We Want Tacos” chant is, oddly, not even all that uncommon at basketball games, given the wide variety of food promotions that exist for when home teams hit certain accomplishments. But at Madison Square Garden, a variation on this chant—the singular form—emerged from a Knicks blowout loss on Saturday night. With four minutes to go and the home team down 24, a crowd that definitely...

5 Comments

Lauren Theisen Lauren Theisen Oct 27, 2019.

Alex Bregman Let Out All His Frustration With One Booming Swing

Alex Bregman Let Out All His Frustration With One Booming Swing

It seems likely that nobody in the World Series was more pissed off than Astros third baseman Alex Bregman heading into Game 4. The ’Stros top hitter in the regular season was only 1-for-13 in the first three games of the Fall Classic. His lone positive contribution was a meaningless dinger in a 12-3 loss, and it was his misplay in that defeat that helped allow the game to get out of...

Lauren Theisen Lauren Theisen Oct 25, 2019. 14 comments

Classic Rock, Ranked

Classic Rock, Ranked

Kelsey said she saw the film Yesterday on a plane. I said I didn’t understand why “Eleanor Rigby” was such a popular Beatles song. This being Deadspin, we have, after hours of yelling at each other in Slack, reached the natural endpoint of this, which is a democratically produced staff ranking of classic rock radio artists.

1. David Bowie
2. Fleetwood Mac
3. The Beatles
4. Steely Dan
5. Jimi...

14 Comments

Lauren Theisen Lauren Theisen Oct 25, 2019. 8 comments

Jarvis Landry Guarantees Victory Against The Patriots, Quickly Regrets It

Jarvis Landry Guarantees Victory Against The Patriots, Quickly Regrets It

The 2-4 Cleveland Browns have a massively intimidating task ahead of them this Sunday, as they travel to New England to take on the undefeated Patriots. This is a team that, when they took on the league’s other remaining undefeated team in Santa Clara three weeks ago, got crushed by a score of 31-3 . But at least at the beginning of his press conference today, Browns wideout Jarvis Landry...

8 Comments

Lauren Theisen Lauren Theisen Oct 24, 2019. 5 comments

Alex Bregman Was So Close To Stopping Everything

Alex Bregman Was So Close To Stopping Everything

It’s obviously hyperbole to say that a misplay on a tough grounder lost the Astros Game 2 of the World Series. But that six-run seventh inning from the Nationals that broke the 2-2 tie and led them to a 12-3 win was such an intense morale-sapper—for both the Houston team and the formerly rowdy crowd they had in the ballpark—that it’s hard not to look for simple answers that explain in more...

5 Comments

Lauren Theisen Lauren Theisen Oct 24, 2019. 20 comments

Report: Sam Darnold's Toenail Removal Procedure Was "Pretty Gross"

Report: Sam Darnold's Toenail Removal Procedure Was "Pretty Gross"

Toenail is the new seeing ghosts is the new spleen is the new mononucleosis . Add to the never-ending list of Sam Darnold’s bizarre ailments a toenail that had to be removed on Tuesday, after the Jets QB’s foot got stepped on during his team’s spooky loss to the Patriots on Monday. Head coach Adam Gase did not specify which little piggy got roastbeefed, but he did say that, even though...

20 Comments

Lauren Theisen Lauren Theisen Oct 23, 2019. 15 comments

David Pastrnak Is Doing Scary Things With His Stick And I Don't Like It

David Pastrnak Is Doing Scary Things With His Stick And I Don't Like It

A PSA: This blog is rated R for frozen violence, scenes of intense terror, and sadistic torture of a goalie.

Boston Bruins winger David Pastrnak has spent the early part of this season menacing the NHL, and the league leader in goals claimed more victims in a Tuesday night win over the Maple Leafs, where the actions he took with the puck on his stick were nothing short of unconscionably...

15 Comments

Lauren Theisen Lauren Theisen Oct 23, 2019. 10 comments

Surprise, Surprise: Masai Ujiri Won't Be Charged For Allegedly "Concussing" Sheriff's Deputy After Winning NBA Finals

Surprise, Surprise: Masai Ujiri Won't Be Charged For Allegedly "Concussing" Sheriff's Deputy After Winning NBA Finals

In a statement almost perfectly timed with the beginning of the defending champion Toronto Raptors’ season, the Alameda County District Attorney’s Office has announced that team president Masai Ujiri won’t be charged for his role in an altercation with a sheriff’s deputy that happened when he tried to get on the court immediately after the Raptors won the NBA championship this year.

For those...

10 Comments

Lauren Theisen Lauren Theisen Oct 23, 2019. 7 comments

Deadspin Up All Night: Free As A Breeze

Deadspin Up All Night: Free As A Breeze

Thank you for your continued support of Deadspin. Enjoy the baseball.

7 Comments

Lauren Theisen Lauren Theisen Oct 23, 2019. 8 comments

Lawsuit Accuses Oscar De La Hoya Of Sexual Assault

Lawsuit Accuses Oscar De La Hoya Of Sexual Assault

Former top-rated boxer and current chairman and CEO of Golden Boy Promotions Oscar De La Hoya has been sued for sexual assault and battery by an anonymous woman in Los Angeles County Superior Court. The plaintiff says in her lawsuit that she was sexually assaulted by the promoter and ex-boxer in November 2017 when, against her wishes, he forced his fist into her vagina.

The lawsuit, filed...

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