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Stephen A. Crockett Jr.'s posts - English uPOST

Stephen A. Crockett Jr. Stephen A. Crockett Jr. 3 hours 23 minutes ago.

Smokin’ Joe Biden Challenged a Man to a Pushup Contest Because He’s Strong AF!

Smokin’ Joe Biden Challenged a Man to a Pushup Contest Because He’s Strong AF!

I don’t know what is wrong with former Vice President Joe Biden, but I swear he’s becoming the living, breathing version of those Obama BFF memes. Remember those memes, in which a Crazy Joe spouts out silly shit and Obama has to tell him to calm his old ass down?

Anyway, on Thursday, during a stop in Iowa on his “No Malarkey” tour (no seriously, the tour is called the “No Malarkey” because...

Stephen A. Crockett Jr. Stephen A. Crockett Jr. yesterday at 04:06.

Former Vice President Joe Biden Burns Trump in New Viral Ad: ‘A President the World Is Laughing At’

Former Vice President Joe Biden Burns Trump in New Viral Ad: ‘A President the World Is Laughing At’

Former Vice President Joe Biden may be the designer imposter fragrance version of Donald Trump, but damn if he didn’t release a fire ad torching the president.

Like battle rappers before him, the 2020 Democratic presidential hopeful took the timeliness of world leaders laughing at Trump during the recent NATO summit in London and mixed that with other instances where Trump has made himself and...

Stephen A. Crockett Jr. Stephen A. Crockett Jr. yesterday at 02:11. 1 comments

5 Reasons the Impeachment Hearings Were Must-See TV

5 Reasons the Impeachment Hearings Were Must-See TV

I will admit that my job requires me to watch all of the congressional hearings, all of the pundits rattling off reasons as to why the world and the economy aren’t going to collapse. I’m literally paid to watch members of Congress fumble over themselves to support one of the most corrupt presidencies America has ever seen.

Despite being paid to watch these programs, what The Root doesn’t know...

1 Comments

Stephen A. Crockett Jr. Stephen A. Crockett Jr. Dec 05, 2019 at 22:33. 11 comments

Speaker Nancy Pelosi Says Trump ‘Leaves Us No Choice But to Act’ on Impeachment

Speaker Nancy Pelosi Says Trump ‘Leaves Us No Choice But to Act’ on Impeachment

And so it begins.

On Thursday, House Speaker Nancy Pelosi announced that she’s asked that articles of impeachment be drafted against President I Did That Shit. Sure impeachment without removal from office is about as damaging as a public indecency charge from 1994; it’s not going to really do anything but it’s embarrassing if it comes up in a job interview.

But it’s happening and it’s a...

11 Comments

Stephen A. Crockett Jr. Stephen A. Crockett Jr. Dec 05, 2019 at 03:00. 1 comments

Presidential Hopefuls Julián Castro and Cory Booker Express Anger, Concern Over Kamala Harris’ Ending Her Campaign

Presidential Hopefuls Julián Castro and Cory Booker Express Anger, Concern Over Kamala Harris’ Ending Her Campaign

Former Housing and Urban Development Secretary Julián Castro didn’t mince words when asked about his feelings on the abrupt ending of California Sen. Kamala Harris’ bid for president.

“To me, they held her to a different standard, a double standard, to other campaigns. And I don’t know if it impacted her decision to withdraw from the race or not, but I’m sure it didn’t help,” Castro told

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Stephen A. Crockett Jr. Stephen A. Crockett Jr. Dec 04, 2019 at 23:47. 3 comments

Kamala Harris Shuts Door on Presidency and Dunks on the President on Her Way Out

Kamala Harris Shuts Door on Presidency and Dunks on the President on Her Way Out

On Tuesday, Sen. Kamala Harris announced that she was ending her presidential campaign , but because Trump knows nothing about an AKA’s ability to clapback—or how to do anything with grace—he sarcastically tweeted, “Too bad. We will miss you Kamala!”

Apparently, no one told the president that Kamala had already obtained three clapback infinity stones by attending Howard University, smoking...

3 Comments

Stephen A. Crockett Jr. Stephen A. Crockett Jr. Dec 04, 2019 at 22:41. 3 comments

World Leaders Caught on Hot Mic Clowning Trump, and Princess Anne Is a Real One

World Leaders Caught on Hot Mic Clowning Trump, and Princess Anne Is a Real One

World leaders and a fussy baby who keeps telling everyone he won the popular vote are in London for the NATO summit. Unfortunately for America, our representative is a failed businessman-turned-reality TV host who can’t stop whining.

Basically, he’s a national embarrassment on a global stage, like a kid that keeps yelling “pee-pee” and “boo-boo” inside the grocery store without warning; you...

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Stephen A. Crockett Jr. Stephen A. Crockett Jr. Dec 04, 2019 at 03:35. 4 comments

House Democrats’ Impeachment Report Confirms Trump Is a Finesser Who Cares More About KFC Than America

House Democrats’ Impeachment Report Confirms Trump Is a Finesser Who Cares More About KFC Than America

In news that should be shocking to no one with opposable thumbs, a report by House Intelligence Committee Democrats confirms that President Trump was more concerned about his own personal gain than the well-being of the country when he tried to finesse a quid pro quo arrangement with the Ukrainian president.

According to several sources, including God and the truth, the president reportedly...

4 Comments

Stephen A. Crockett Jr. Stephen A. Crockett Jr. Dec 04, 2019 at 03:00.

Trump Offers ‘Isis Fighters’ to French President Because He Just Can’t Stop Being a Global Embarrassment

Trump Offers ‘Isis Fighters’ to French President Because He Just Can’t Stop Being a Global Embarrassment

American albatross and the president of people who believe in UFOs sat across from the president of France—a real president—who continuously embarrassed Trump in a tense meeting that the U.S. president made tense by being an asshole.

During the sideline NATO meeting Tuesday, Trump did the condescending asshole-y thing he does where he offered the French leader, Emmanuel Macron, “ISIS fighters”...

Stephen A. Crockett Jr. Stephen A. Crockett Jr. Dec 04, 2019 at 01:53. 8 comments

Kamala Harris Drops Out of Presidential Race Amid Rumors of a Directionless Campaign That Was Hemorrhaging Cash

Kamala Harris Drops Out of Presidential Race Amid Rumors of a Directionless Campaign That Was Hemorrhaging Cash

Sen. Kamala Harris (D-Calif.), the spitfire with the HBCU bonafides, has dropped out of the 2020 presidential race amid rumors that her campaign lacked direction, had no cash and “no real plan to win,” according to one campaign staffer who resigned and burned the bridge on her way out the door.

According to the Washington Post, Harris, 55, wrote a somber note to supporters, explaining that “my...

8 Comments

Stephen A. Crockett Jr. Stephen A. Crockett Jr. Dec 04, 2019 at 00:30. 9 comments

Kellyanne Conway Tried to Burn Joe Biden. Then Her Husband Came and Lit Her Ass Up

Kellyanne Conway Tried to Burn Joe Biden. Then Her Husband Came and Lit Her Ass Up

I am convinced—and no one can unconvince me—that White House counselor Kellyanne Conway and her husband, Mr. Kellyanne Conway, have a sex game that looks like this: Kellyanne, aka Lil Half-Dead, will work for one of the most powerful racists in the country and Mr. Kellyanne Conway (I think his name is George or Bill or something generically Anglo-Saxon) will troll the fuck out of her and her...

9 Comments

Stephen A. Crockett Jr. Stephen A. Crockett Jr. Dec 03, 2019 at 07:00. 17 comments

Trump Won’t Participate in This Week’s House Judiciary Impeachment Hearing Because He Did That Shit

Trump Won’t Participate in This Week’s House Judiciary Impeachment Hearing Because He Did That Shit

Look, it’s time that we stop hemming and hawing around what we know to be the truth: Trump tied Ukrainian aid to dirt on possible Democratic 2020 rival Joe Biden and his son, Hunter. That happened.

Full stop.

What’s happened since then has been a game of let’s see if the GOP can make a mockery of the truth by continuously throwing shit at it until they stink up the entire process. Basically,...

17 Comments

Stephen A. Crockett Jr. Stephen A. Crockett Jr. Dec 03, 2019 at 00:30. 5 comments

The Race for Trump’s Love: GOP Sen. John Kennedy Is Closing in on Sen. Lindsey Graham

The Race for Trump’s Love: GOP Sen. John Kennedy Is Closing in on Sen. Lindsey Graham

Sen. John Kennedy (R-La.) is an old white man, which means he can pretty much say anything and not be held accountable. He can say things that aren’t true and then simply come back late and claim “I misspoke” or just yell out “fake news,” and despite there being camera footage, he can still insist that it’s all a ploy by the left-wing media to try and bury him.

So it’s with no fear that Sen....

5 Comments

Stephen A. Crockett Jr. Stephen A. Crockett Jr. Dec 02, 2019 at 23:55.

President Face-Skin Doesn’t Match His Neck-Skin Calls Impeachment Hearings a ‘Big Time Hoax’

President Face-Skin Doesn’t Match His Neck-Skin Calls Impeachment Hearings a ‘Big Time Hoax’

Stop me if you’ve heard this before.

Seriously, stop me.

Why aren’t you stopping me?

The president got in front of cameras with his face all orange-y and his neck all white before leaving to go to London to argue some NATO shit that he doesn’t understand and told the cameras that the impeachment hearing is all a big hoax.

And because the president wasn’t done, he then got on Air Force...

Stephen A. Crockett Jr. Stephen A. Crockett Jr. Dec 02, 2019 at 22:00.

We Knew It: Melania Trump Reportedly Sleeps in the Guest Bedroom Where Michelle Obama’s Mom Used to Stay

We Knew It: Melania Trump Reportedly Sleeps in the Guest Bedroom Where Michelle Obama’s Mom Used to Stay

Melania Trump is no damsel in distress; in fact, she’s a calculated genius (if her visa is to be believed) who plotted on the old orange man with the attractive bank account. But unless Scrooge McDuck sleeps with his money, Melania reportedly has no interest in laying next to his old wrinkly ass.

Either Melania Trump Is the Slovenian Rain Man or She Finessed Her ‘Einstein Visa’

Until I see...

Stephen A. Crockett Jr. Stephen A. Crockett Jr. Aug 31, 2019. 17 comments

Trump Administration Continues Descent Into Hell, Seeks to Deport Immigrant Children With Life-Threatening Illnesses

Trump Administration Continues Descent Into Hell, Seeks to Deport Immigrant Children With Life-Threatening Illnesses

The stale swamp water that is the Trump administration has issued a policy change that would deport hundreds of immigrant children with life-threatening illnesses, because the Trump administration is dog shit.

From CBS News:

A vibrating vest, nebulizer, and special medication help keep 16-year-old Jonathan Sanchez alive. He’s battling cystic fibrosis, a life-threatening disorder damaging his...

17 Comments

Stephen A. Crockett Jr. Stephen A. Crockett Jr. Aug 31, 2019. 11 comments

Fredo Jr. Headlined a Rally in Kentucky and It Was a Total Disaster

Fredo Jr. Headlined a Rally in Kentucky and It Was a Total Disaster

Donald Trump Jr. headlined a rally in Kentucky and he could’ve given the exact same speech in his bathroom and it would’ve been better attended. The rally on Thursday afternoon for Kentucky Gov. Matt Bevin was so bad that people wondered if it was co-sponsored by Ja Rule.

According to Newsweek, the rally was so bad that organizers asked attendees to leave their seats and come upfront and...

11 Comments

Stephen A. Crockett Jr. Stephen A. Crockett Jr. Aug 30, 2019. 13 comments

Trump’s Personal Assistant Resigns Because She Couldn’t Stop Flossin’ and Spilling Tea

Trump’s Personal Assistant Resigns Because She Couldn’t Stop Flossin’ and Spilling Tea

A white woman with arguably the whitest name ever is no longer working in the Whitest House after reports that she shared some inner secrets about the president’s family with reporters.

According to Politico, Madeleine Westerhout, of the New England Westerhouts (I have no idea if there is Westerhout lineage in New England, but it does seem fitting, doesn’t it?) abruptly resigned from her...

13 Comments

Stephen A. Crockett Jr. Stephen A. Crockett Jr. Aug 30, 2019. 19 comments

Yes, the President Patted His Leg for Melania to Walk to Him Like a Dog and Let’s Stop Acting Surprised

Yes, the President Patted His Leg for Melania to Walk to Him Like a Dog and Let’s Stop Acting Surprised

If we were going to encapsulate the president’s presidency in one moment, it would be a split screen of him placing his McDonald’s order on one side and him admitting to grabbing unsuspecting women by their genitalia on the other.

Fine, that’s two moments, but let’s break them down, shall we? Nothing says I’m a narcissist, racist, xenophobe, and hater of all things including my arteries like...

19 Comments

Stephen A. Crockett Jr. Stephen A. Crockett Jr. Aug 29, 2019. 6 comments

Watch: Chris Cuomo Cuts Trump Minion Interview Short After She Refuses to Admit the President Lies

Watch: Chris Cuomo Cuts Trump Minion Interview Short After She Refuses to Admit the President Lies

CNN host Chris Cuomo once threatened to throw a guy down a flight of stairs for calling him “Fredo.” And by once, I mean earlier this month.

CNN Host Chris Cuomo Wanted All the Smoke, But C’mon Son, ‘Fredo’ Ain’t the N-Word

CNN host Chris Cuomo is with the shits on his show. He never backs down from a fuss fight no matter …

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So it’s with that I say that Cuomo has little patience...

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