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Dan McQuade Dan McQuade Oct 28, 2019. 5 comments

The Browns Turned It Over On Three Consecutive Offensive Snaps

The Browns Turned It Over On Three Consecutive Offensive Snaps

The Cleveland Browns came into their game against New England this week with a lot of optimism. Jarvis Landry even guaranteed victory over the defending Super Bowl champs, before recanting a bit.

Maybe there was a reason he walked back his prediction. The Browns dug a 17-0 hole against the Patriots today, in part because they turned the ball over on three consecutive offensive snaps.

First...

5 Comments

David Roth David Roth Oct 24, 2019. 5 comments

Can Simone Biles Dunk?

Can Simone Biles Dunk?

First things first: yes we actually talk about the important sports things that are happening right now in this Deadcast. The World Series is happening and we address that; Dom Cosentino, who does not really care that much about the World Series, joined us for this one, and we talked to him about the NFL and the stupid sexy Patriots and the NFL’s strange recent flurry of trades n’ tank jobs....

5 Comments

Jordan Sargent Jordan Sargent Oct 24, 2019. 15 comments

The Dolphins As North Korea

The Dolphins As North Korea
The Blowhole Welcome to The Blowhole, a weekly column in which a lifelong Dolphins fan breaks down the performance of the 2019 team, perhaps the worst in NFL history.Prev NextView All

The Miami Dolphins’ loss to the Buffalo Bills on Sunday was their most normal game of the season, which is to say that it was their least interesting. The circus came to town, but nobody fell from the trapeze or...

15 Comments

Laura Wagner Laura Wagner Oct 23, 2019. 8 comments

Sports Reporter Blasts Slimeball Patriots Fan Who Tried To Kiss Her During MNF Interview

Sports Reporter Blasts Slimeball Patriots Fan Who Tried To Kiss Her During MNF Interview

Sports reporter for PointsBet Sportsbook Erin Kate Dolan was interviewing a fan before Monday night’s Pats-Jets football game when a pasty creep wearing a Tom Brady jersey tried to plant a kiss on her. She skillfully ducked him and walked away.

She posted the video on Twitter this morning with a caption that tidily summed up what it’s like to be a woman working in a male-dominated industry:

8 Comments

Tom Ley Tom Ley Oct 22, 2019. 12 comments

Fantasy Football Man Mad

Fantasy Football Man Mad

Oh brother, can you believe that shit that happened last weekend? In the fantasy football? With the frickin’ Cardinals? They really boned us, fellas! I know you know what I’m talking about! Gah, I’m so steamed! And so is ESPN fantasy football analyst Matthew Berry:

Can you believe it! What they’ve done to us? This cannot stand!

12 Comments

David Roth David Roth Oct 18, 2019. 17 comments

The Washington Nationals Are The Team Of Destiny, Until They're Not

The Washington Nationals Are The Team Of Destiny, Until They're Not

For the entirety of their brief existence in the nation’s capital, the Washington Nationals have been too insignificant or too lousy or too unlucky or too self-defeating to hate. This is not to say that I haven’t figured out various ways to do it over the years, but also I am not without some interest in all this as both a Mets fan and—and please forgive the redundancy, here—an emotionally...

17 Comments

Drew Magary Drew Magary Oct 18, 2019. 22 comments

This Post Could Give You Just The Spark You Needed

This Post Could Give You Just The Spark You Needed

Drew Magary’s Thursday Afternoon NFL Dick Joke Jamboroo runs every Thursday during the NFL season. Email Drew here. Buy his book here .

Titans franchise quarterback Marcus Mariota lost his job this week . The immortal Ryan Tannehill will be starting in his place when Tennessee faces the Chargers on Sunday. Why is this? Well, it’s because Mariota is an inert passer. But also, in an EXCLUSIVE,...

22 Comments

Drew Magary Drew Magary Oct 04, 2019. 24 comments

You’re Not An Owner

You’re Not An Owner

Drew Magary’s Thursday Afternoon NFL Dick Joke Jamboroo runs every Thursday during the NFL season. Email Drew here. Buy his book here .

I liked sports more when I knew less about it. Melvin Gordon ended his holdout and reported back to the Chargers before last Sunday’s win over a beached Dolphins team that plays football about as well as I dance. Gordon didn’t play in that game. He didn’t...

24 Comments

Jordan Sargent Jordan Sargent Oct 03, 2019. 15 comments

Dad Made The Very Sleepy Chargers Get Out Of Bed And Beat The Dolphins

Dad Made The Very Sleepy Chargers Get Out Of Bed And Beat The Dolphins
The BlowholeWelcome to The Blowhole, a weekly column in which a lifelong Dolphins fan breaks down the performance of the 2019 team, perhaps the worst in NFL history.  

Okay, so I can’t show you what it would look like if the Miami Dolphins played a college football team. But I can show you what it would look like if the Miami Dolphins played in a college football game, and were the college...

15 Comments

Oct 01, 2019. 19 comments

A Philosopher's Definitive (And Slightly Maddening) Case Against Replay Review

A Philosopher's Definitive (And Slightly Maddening) Case Against Replay Review

The motivation for using video review in sports is obvious: to get more calls right. This seems like an easy enough mission to fulfill, but anyone who has spent even a little time watching sports on TV can attest to the fact that the application of video review is not so simple. In most sports where it is applied, video review has actually created more confusion and less clarity. Why is this...

19 Comments

Drew Magary Drew Magary Sep 27, 2019. 23 comments

You Cannot Fuck Up Visiting New Orleans

You Cannot Fuck Up Visiting New Orleans

Drew Magary’s Thursday Afternoon NFL Dick Joke Jamboroo runs every Thursday during the NFL season. Email Drew here. Buy his book here .

There are a whole lot of dead people in New Orleans. I saw them resting in vast cemeteries that ran alongside the interstate seemingly for miles on the way into town—a drive from the airport that was so long that I started thinking to myself Uh, where’s New...

23 Comments

David Roth David Roth Sep 27, 2019. 7 comments

We Have A Wet Bag Problem, And We're Going To Look Into It

We Have A Wet Bag Problem, And We're Going To Look Into It

There is nothing funny about lower-body injuries in baseball. Upper body injuries, sure—a “strained oblique” sounds just vague enough to get an eye-roll, and Mets-scented mystery injuries like the Out With An Entire Left Side Of Body ailment that sidelined prized Mets free agent Jed Lowrie for virtually the entire season are a delight forever. But a player hurting his ankle or his knee on a...

7 Comments

Jordan Sargent Jordan Sargent Sep 25, 2019. 16 comments

The Blowhole: Brian Flores Wants To Spoonfeed You Sadness

The Blowhole: Brian Flores Wants To Spoonfeed You Sadness
The BlowholeWelcome to The Blowhole, a weekly column in which a lifelong Dolphins fan breaks down the performance of the 2019 team, perhaps the worst in NFL history.  

The most important thing to know about the Miami Dolphins is that their new coach, Brian Flores, treats every game like he will be held criminally liable if anything interesting happens. Dolphins fans, befitting a franchise that...

16 Comments

Dan McQuade Dan McQuade Sep 23, 2019. 13 comments

Giants Player Tackles Teammate Running For Touchdown

Giants Player Tackles Teammate Running For Touchdown
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A preface to this highlight: Jameis Winston’s fumble here was ruled an incompletion on replay, so it didn’t matter that Jabrill Peppers pushed down Alec Ogletree when he was running down the field with only green grass in front of him? But why did Jabrill Peppers tackle Alec Ogletree??

Ogletree slowed down at the end...

13 Comments

Dave McKenna Dave McKenna Sep 20, 2019. 6 comments

PR Genius Tony Wyllie Takes His Talents Away From Dan Snyder

PR Genius Tony Wyllie Takes His Talents Away From Dan Snyder

Sports radio station WJFK in D.C. reported today that Tony Wyllie has quit as Dan Snyder’s communications director to take a job with the Special Olympics. If any good PR came Snyder’s way during Wyllie’s nine-year run with Washington’s NFL team, it doesn’t come to mind. As for the gaffes on Wyllie’s watch, well, the internet’s not big enough to list all those.

Wyllie was going to change the...

6 Comments

David Roth David Roth Sep 20, 2019. 14 comments

The Good NFL Quarterbacks Are Falling Apart

The Good NFL Quarterbacks Are Falling Apart

Even leaving aside the headaches and nausea that are specific to the fans of the Jets and Giants, and the flu-like symptoms that universally apply to all AFC South games, watching the NFL does something to a person. You may sit down in front of a game as a normal human—again, not applicable to Jets or Giants fans—but when you rise you will have been at least somewhat altered by what you’ve...

14 Comments

Drew Magary Drew Magary Sep 20, 2019. 22 comments

Kirk Cousins Isn’t Worth A Shit

Kirk Cousins Isn’t Worth A Shit

Drew Magary’s Thursday Afternoon NFL Dick Joke Jamboroo runs every Thursday during the NFL season. Email Drew here. Buy his book here .

Before we get into this, I should issue a HOMER ALERT because I am a Vikings fan and because this is a post about Kirk Cousins. As far as I’m concerned, all homerism should be disclosed up front, the same way a SPOILER WARNING must be displayed atop any online...

22 Comments

Patrick Redford Patrick Redford Sep 20, 2019. 16 comments

New York Giants Get Tired Of Mike Francesa Telling Them They Stink, Cut Ties With His Show

New York Giants Get Tired Of Mike Francesa Telling Them They Stink, Cut Ties With His Show
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Mike Francesa has really stepped in it this time. The sleepy goofus had a standing weekly interview with New York Giants head coach Pat Shurmur every Monday on WFAN, but the relationship between grouchy radio host and grouchy organization has reached its breaking point. Shurmur said today he will no longer appear on...

16 Comments

Diana Moskovitz Diana Moskovitz Sep 17, 2019. 23 comments

Antonio Brown And The Conversation Nobody Wants To Have

Antonio Brown And The Conversation Nobody Wants To Have

I watched the NFL on CBS this Sunday because I knew they had no choice but to talk about Antonio Brown. Brown was sued earlier this week by a former trainer, Britney Taylor, who said that Brown sexually assaulted and raped her when she worked for him. The day before, Brown had been signed by the New England Patriots, an AFC team, and the Patriots were due to play the Miami Dolphins, another...

23 Comments

David Roth David Roth Sep 13, 2019. 13 comments

Should A Home Run Automatically End An Inning?

Should A Home Run Automatically End An Inning?

I will not keep you waiting for an answer on this one. No, absolutely not and under no circumstances would it be a good idea for a homer to automatically end an inning in a big league baseball game. It seems important not to equivocate on this question. And yet this Funbag question, from a listener named Kacey who absolutely needs to send us more such questions, struck both Drew and me as...

13 Comments