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Billy Haisley Billy Haisley yesterday at 01:06.

Josef Martínez's Hideous Penalty Kick Run-Up Ends In Humiliation

Josef Martínez's Hideous Penalty Kick Run-Up Ends In Humiliation
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The reward for Josef Martínez’s frankly insane penalty kick routine is an unreadable technique that makes it easy to best keepers from the spot, as evidenced by the Atlanta United forward’s 14-for-16 penalty record in MLS. The risk is that it makes him look like a huge weirdo and sets him up for ridicule when he...

Gabe Fernandez Gabe Fernandez Jul 21, 2019 at 04:14.

The Rockies Tried Their Best To Kill The Yankees

The Rockies Tried Their Best To Kill The Yankees
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The Rockies and Yankees are having two very different seasons, with the Bronx Bombers having the best record in the American League and the purple lads from Colorado being trapped in a tailspin on the way to being the worst team in the National League not named the Marlins. Given that conventional methods of trying to...

Tom Ley Tom Ley Jul 18, 2019 at 21:07. 8 comments

Well, This Isn't How You Want To Start A Major Tournament

Well, This Isn't How You Want To Start A Major Tournament

The Open Championship got underway this morning on a rainy day at Royal Portrush in Northern Ireland. Rory McIlroy, who is from Northern Ireland and grew up playing on the course, had just about the worst possible start to his day.

McIlroy stepped up to the tee on his first hole and proceeded to rip a drive way out of bounds, hitting a fan in the stomach and breaking her cell phone.

He then...

8 Comments

Barry Petchesky Barry Petchesky Jul 18, 2019 at 19:57.

Justin Upton Makes A Spectacular Leaping Attempt Really Nowhere Near The Ball

Justin Upton Makes A Spectacular Leaping Attempt Really Nowhere Near The Ball

Justin Upton leads all active MLB outfielder with 82 career errors. The galaxy-brained solution to avoid adding to that tally? Misplay a ball so badly he ends up nowhere near it, giving the official scorer no choice but to rule it a hit.

Upton did his best Torii Hunter impression on a big fly by Alex Bregman in the first inning of Wednesday’s Angels-Astros game, sprinting to the track in...

Chris Thompson Chris Thompson Jul 16, 2019 at 07:56. 13 comments

Giannis Antetokounmpo Sucks Real Bad At Baseball

Giannis Antetokounmpo Sucks Real Bad At Baseball

Giannis Antetokounmpo is the reigning NBA Most Valuable Player. He’s 24 years old, his Bucks won 60 games last season, and Kawhi Leonard just left the Eastern Conference to play for the Clippers. Things are going pretty great for Giannis and his basketball career, so I don’t think he will mind too much if I point out that he is really lousy at hitting a baseball. Look at this baby crap:

To be...

13 Comments

Gabe Fernandez Gabe Fernandez Jul 15, 2019.

Army's Beatdown Of Houston Reached The "Punt From The Black Knights' 30" Stage

Army's Beatdown Of Houston Reached The "Punt From The Black Knights' 30" Stage

The Houston Cougars were thoroughly spanked by the Army Black Knights in the Armed Forces Bowl. While some coaches would want their players to play hard through the final whistle of the game—despite being down well over 40 points—Houston coach Major Applewhite raised the white flag early in the second half.

Houston followed up the first five plays of a third-quarter drive that took the team 51...

Kevin Draper Kevin Draper Jul 15, 2019.

Goalie Scores Improbably Stupid Own Goal

Goalie Scores Improbably Stupid Own Goal

Goalie Mickael Roche somehow scored this own goal in an Oceania Champions League match between AS Tefana (Tahiti) and Nadi (Fiji). If you recognize Roche’s name from anything, it’s probably because he was the poor sap in goal when Spain blasted Tahiti 10-0 in the 2013 Confederations Cup.

Chris Thompson Chris Thompson Jul 15, 2019.

It's Too Early To Say The Cubs Are In Trouble, But Not Too Early To Enjoy Their Fuck-Ups

It's Too Early To Say The Cubs Are In Trouble, But Not Too Early To Enjoy Their Fuck-Ups

The Cubs have not gotten off to the start anyone envisioned over the winter. They’re 1–3, having dropped a season-opening series to the Rangers, and having absorbed a deflating 8–0 loss to the Atlanta Braves Monday night. This is a vanishingly tiny sample size, and the Cubs were picked by various experts to win anywhere between 82 and 93 games, so most of what has happened so far should, for...

Patrick Redford Patrick Redford Jul 15, 2019.

Kobe Bryant, What Are You Doing?

Kobe Bryant, What Are You Doing?

This is not a long video, nor a particularly great quality one, but it is very illustrative.

Hell of a way to commemorate maybe his last game in MSG.

Update: Here’s a better look at it.

Open tools.kinja-labs.com

Photo via AP

Open kinja-labs.com

Chris Thompson Chris Thompson Jul 15, 2019.

One Khris Middleton Shot Blocked By 60 Percent Of Hornets Lineup

One Khris Middleton Shot Blocked By 60 Percent Of Hornets Lineup
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One pretty sure sign that you’ve chosen a bad shot is when it is stuffed back in your face by a defender. Khris Middleton is having an excellent season for the Milwaukee Bucks, but if your shot is blocked by three different defenders, probably you owe your teammates a sincere apology.

Here’s a question: is this three...

Tom Ley Tom Ley Jul 15, 2019.

Kobe Bryant Is Back, Motherfuckers!

Kobe Bryant Is Back, Motherfuckers!

Kobe Bryant played in a preseason game against the Jazz last night, and it was the closest he’s been to real NBA game action in nine months. In case you were wondering, he’s still Kobe:

I really missed having him around.

Open kinja-labs.com

Patrick Redford Patrick Redford Jul 15, 2019.

University Of Alabama "Appalled" At Hurricane Katrina-Referencing Sign

University Of Alabama "Appalled" At Hurricane Katrina-Referencing Sign

The #7 Alabama Crimson Tide host #4 LSU today. It should be a good game, and like any rivalry game, it’s had its fair share of fan pranks, celebrity (kinda) appearances (almost), and moments of staggering public idiocy from college students.

Not a great look! You guys must have spent a lot of time spray painting that racist fart noise of a sign which, sorry to say, your school is “appalled”...

Barry Petchesky Barry Petchesky Jul 15, 2019.

It Is Hazardous To Look Directly At Alex Smith's Lowlight Reel

It Is Hazardous To Look Directly At Alex Smith's Lowlight Reel

It was not quantifiably the worst passing performance of the season or even the week. But Alex Smith’s Monday night stinkbomb, especially contrasted with a superlative (and record-breaking ) game from Drew Brees, was for my money the ugliest QB performance of the season.

Smith was 23 of 39 for 275 yards in Washington’s 43-19 loss to the Saints, and he can thank garbage time for that line’s...

Gabe Fernandez Gabe Fernandez Jul 15, 2019.

White Sox Make Circus Out Of Red Sox Baserunning Error

White Sox Make Circus Out Of Red Sox Baserunning Error

Red Sox third baseman Rafael Devers was almost tagged out while returning to first after a wide turn screwed up his attempt at turning his hit to deep left field into a double. Lucky for him, White Sox first baseman José Abreu was unable to make the catch and let the ball get by him, making Devers was safe. At that point, Devers decided to go for while Abreu chased after the ball. Abreu’s...

Chris Thompson Chris Thompson Jul 15, 2019.

Tragic Hero Trevor Cahill Pays Dearly For Runaway Ambition

Tragic Hero Trevor Cahill Pays Dearly For Runaway Ambition
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Wednesday afternoon the Angels lost a close one to the Minnesota Twins, 8–7. Angels pitcher Trevor Cahill took the loss, allowing six earned runs in 4.1 innings pitched, so right there you already know it wasn’t his best day. The defining moment of Cahill’s lousy outing, and certainly the most regrettable one, came in...

Gabe Fernandez Gabe Fernandez Jul 14, 2019.

The Pacers Kept Handing Bojan Bogdanovic The Ball Until It Killed Them

The Pacers Kept Handing Bojan Bogdanovic The Ball Until It Killed Them

It looked like the Pacers got some much-needed redemption on Wednesday. After putting up a measly eight points in the third quarter against the Celtics in Game 1—Indiana would go on to lose 84-74—the Pacers had a strong third quarter of their own in Game 2, outscoring Boston 29-16. But that momentum quickly fell apart shortly after the fourth quarter began, and Indiana suddenly only had three...

Chris Thompson Chris Thompson Jul 14, 2019.

76ers Subjected To Two Miserable Last-Second Losses In One Game

76ers Subjected To Two Miserable Last-Second Losses In One Game

The 76ers lost by a point to the lowly Bulls Wednesday night, 108–107, in Chicago. Whatever. The Sixers have performed admirably during this suddenly indefinite stretch of games without Joel Embiid, and the Bulls are much better now than they were before the trade deadline, and the Sixers were on the second leg of a back-to-back. Point is, it’s not a real bad loss. It’s really how they lost...

Giri Nathan Giri Nathan Jul 14, 2019.

Knicks Lose London Game In Knicksiest Imaginable Fashion

Knicks Lose London Game In Knicksiest Imaginable Fashion
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Though Congress has yet to designate it an official act of war, the NBA sent the Knicks to London.

Despite a 19-point lead over the Wizards, the fourth quarter got tight, so the Knicks naturally ran countless Emmanuel Mudiay isos down the stretch. On New York’s last real possession of the game, Mudiay managed to hit...

Chris Thompson Chris Thompson Jul 14, 2019.

Dolphins Gifted Red Zone First Down On Highly Suspect Illegal Contact Penalty

Dolphins Gifted Red Zone First Down On Highly Suspect Illegal Contact Penalty

The NFL’s rules about who can hit who and when, and how, and where, are even more confusing than I thought. Tonight the Dolphins were gifted a first down and half the distance to the goal on a call I’m not sure I’ve ever seen before: a personal foul against the Texans for making contact with, uh, the upper body of a long-snapper.

Joel Heath appears to crash into long snapper John Denney’s...

Gabe Fernandez Gabe Fernandez Jul 14, 2019.

The NBA Rising Stars Challenge Featured A Strong Collection Of Apathetic Highlight Attempts

The NBA Rising Stars Challenge Featured A Strong Collection Of Apathetic Highlight Attempts
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The 2019 NBA Rising Stars Challenge on Friday saw Team USA defeat Team World 161-144 in a game was about as half-assed defensively as one would expect with that scoreline. But despite this crop of young NBA talent getting some of the best looks they’ve gotten all season, it didn’t prevent some of the worst misses from...

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