LOADING ...

Leave Malia Obama the Hell Alone and Let Her Enjoy Life (and Facebook)

Corey Townsend Feb 20, 2019. 19 comments

Malia Obama continues to be photographed minding her black-ass business—this time, the 20-year-old college student was seen drinking out of a bottle of rosé during a weekend spent in Miami with friends.

Shudder at the thought of a bottle of rosé being in Miami, which is obviously the epicenter for wholesome good times and mild-mannered frivolity. In college at this age, I was drinking Everclear and E&J, so I have to commend Malia for having taste at such a young age. (Editor’s note: We hear the brand was the highly rated Whispering Angel, so yes.)

British tabloid the Daily Mail gleefully ran the story on the “underage” Obama on Sunday, followed by a second installment on Monday featuring screenshots from Malia’s long dormant personal Facebook account filled with anti-Trump sentiments.

An Obama displeased with Trump’s administration? It’s like florals in Spring: groundbreaking. The tabloid posted private images from her clearly not-so-secret Facebook account that described Donald Trump as evil—basically just duplicating her account for clicks.

Is Malia Obama being a regular young adult really newsworthy? One would think Flint has clean water by this point.

If Malia was a privileged white man she would have a promising future as SCOTUS.

The only true story here is that as previously (and repeatedly) noted, Malia probably needs better friends, because only a “friend” would have access to her private pages. It’s time to do some vetting.

Malia shouldn’t be chastised for living life as a private citizen. I mean, she’s a college student and no longer a resident of the White House. It’s not like she lied to the American people and got in bed with Russia.

19 Comments

Other Corey Townsend's posts

Steven Canals Was Told 'No' Over 100 Times, But One 'Yes' Led to 6 Pose Emmy Nominations Steven Canals Was Told 'No' Over 100 Times, But One 'Yes' Led to 6 Pose Emmy Nominations

I’ve been gay as hell for some time now. I didn’t always have the language to articulate this, but I’ve had this affinity for a month of Sundays. Growing up, representation was lacking, so black women were what I turned to.I knew good and well I wasn’t a black woman—I wasn’t that blessed—but they portrayed characteristics that I admired...

Protecting Pride: Safe Spaces Are Crucial to the Existence of the LGBTQ Community Protecting Pride: Safe Spaces Are Crucial to the Existence of the LGBTQ Community

Pride Month is a time of celebration. A time where same-gender-loving men get together to celebrate love, liberty, and the occasional Beyoncé. During these celebrations, it is imperative for us to feel safe in the spaces we inhabit. Our mere existence can be viewed as a threat to some, and therefore, many of us have to be mindful of...

July 2019 Beyoncé Is Coming to Pride Rock In Lion King Live-Action Remake July 2019 Beyoncé Is Coming to Pride Rock In Lion King Live-Action Remake

The Lion King has never been a favorite of mine, mostly because I’m convinced Mufasa did some shit to Scar to make him vengeful, and I’m pretty sure whatever it was, it was cause enough for Scar to react. But it’s 2018 and your childhood is coming back to life with Disney’s live-action remake.On the day of thanks Disney...

Unreleased Music From Beyoncé Leaked and Somebody's Probably Getting Fired Unreleased Music From Beyoncé Leaked and Somebody's Probably Getting Fired

It’s no secret that Beyoncé has no respect for our edges, so it shouldn’t come as a surprise that she’d release music at some ungodly-ass hour. We learned that when the Beyoncé digital album dropped in 2013, and ever since that faithful night, we’ve all been on the edge of our seats in anticipation for new music from Bey.On...

Suggested posts

Barack Obama Gives Urban Alliance Interns the Surprise of Their Lives Barack Obama Gives Urban Alliance Interns the Surprise of Their Lives

In his efforts to further cement his status as the coolest former president of all-time, Barack Obama treated students at his Obama Foundation to a special surprise.On Tuesday, the Hill reports that our forever president pulled up on a group of Urban Alliance interns, more commonly known as the Obama Youth Job Corps as a result of their partnership...

Natasha Rothwell’s Tweets to Donald Trump Are Petty and Perfect Natasha Rothwell’s Tweets to Donald Trump Are Petty and Perfect

Natasha Rothwell does Twitter phenomenally well. Aside from being the face of one of our favorite memes on Twitter, the Insecure star has tweeted (nearly every day since the 2016 election) that Trump is trash. Do y’all realize the level of commitment it takes to notify 45 (and the world), on the daily that he is, in fact, hot flaming...

Jesse Jackson and Son Jesse Jr. Beg Trump’s Pardon for Disgraced Former Illinois Governor Rod Blagojevich Jesse Jackson and Son Jesse Jr. Beg Trump’s Pardon for Disgraced Former Illinois Governor Rod Blagojevich

Civil rights icon the Rev. Jesse Jackson and his oldest son, former U.S. Rep. Jesse Jackson Jr., are throwing their weight behind a push to implore Donald Trump for the release and full presidential pardon of Rod Blagojevich, the former Illinois governor imprisoned for trying to auction off Barack Obama’s old U.S. Senate seat to the highest bidder.Following Obama’s...

Yeah, Donald Trump’s a Racist...and So Was Every Other American President Yeah, Donald Trump’s a Racist...and So Was Every Other American President

Remember that scene in literally every superhero origin story, when the superhero person did some super shit in public for the first time, and most people who witnessed it were like, “Whoa!!! That was some super shit! Who knew we had super people here?” (And then a few are like, “Well actually what just happened can be explained as...

New Barack Obama Statue Includes a Surprise Dose of Black Girl Magic New Barack Obama Statue Includes a Surprise Dose of Black Girl Magic

I’ve never spent a day of my life in South Dakota, but artist James Van Nuys just provided compelling incentive to do so. On Saturday, the 64-year-old sculptor revealed the latest addition to Rapid City’s City of Presidents project—a life-size sculpture of our forever President Barack Obama.KOTA reports that the bronze sculpture, which took about two years and over...

Judge Restores Obama-Era Drilling Ban, Ruling Trump's Reversal Unlawful Judge Restores Obama-Era Drilling Ban, Ruling Trump's Reversal Unlawful

Donald Trump has spent much of his time as president undercutting the presidency and character of Barack Obama.This week, Obama’s drilling agenda scored a win against Trump’s efforts to revitalize offshore drilling.In 2015, Obama stopped exploration in areas important to the walrus, in the Beaufort and Chukchi seas and the Hanna shoal. The next year, he withdrew nearly all...

Pipe Bombs Found at the Homes of Hilary Clinton, Obama and Billionaire George Soros Pipe Bombs Found at the Homes of Hilary Clinton, Obama and Billionaire George Soros

Like a cut scene from The Dark Knight Rises, explosive devices have been intercepted at the homes of Hillary Clinton, former President Obama, and George Soros.On Tuesday, a pipe bomb loaded with explosive black powder was hand-delivered to billionaire political donor George Soros’ New York estate. Then on Wednesday, Secret Service agents found two “potential explosive devices” in mail...

‘The Bridge to Opportunity’: Netflix Honors Music Executive Clarence Avant in New Documentary The Black Godfather ‘The Bridge to Opportunity’: Netflix Honors Music Executive Clarence Avant in New Documentary The Black Godfather

“He wasn’t there, but he was right there.”These days, when you hear the term “influencer,” one may think of perfectly placed and filtered sponsored ads on Instagram racking up hundreds of thousands of likes within minutes. Well, when you think of the original meaning of the term, one man who embodied it was Clarence Avant also known as “The...

Facebook Waves the Mutumbo Finger at White Nationalists, Offers Judgment-Free Rehabilitation in Exchange Facebook Waves the Mutumbo Finger at White Nationalists, Offers Judgment-Free Rehabilitation in Exchange

One week after the house that Mark Zuckerberg built revealed its plans to address the discriminatory nature in which it excludes minorities and other protected groups from accessing housing, employment, and credit advertisements comes the news that white supremacist rhetoric is no longer welcome on its platform—allegedly.According to the Washington Post, Facebook will banish posts, photos, and other content...

Trump Continues to Steal Black Man’s Work; Takes Credit for Veterans' Healthcare Changes Started Under Obama Trump Continues to Steal Black Man’s Work; Takes Credit for Veterans' Healthcare Changes Started Under Obama

When President Donald Trump isn’t busy trying to erase former President Barack Obama’s legacy, he’s taking credit for Obama’s work.According to a fact check by the Associated Press, President Trump and his Secretary of Veterans Affairs Robert Wilkie took credit for veterans healthcare program improvements made under President Obama because Trump is the guy in the group assignment that...

Language