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The Ongoing Adventures of Officers Sarasota and Butch

AFistfulofBurners Mar 05, 2015. 0 comments

Officers Sarasota and Butch strolled out of the Chipotle, wiping their hands. They spotted a 14 year old black kid, whose face darkened with apprehension. He glanced down at their weapons.

"Hey! Hey you!" the kid turned to run

"Did you just look at our guns? You definitely made eye contact with our guns!" the kid was in a full sprint now, looking to get away, with Sarasota and Butch in hot pursuit

"Looking at our guns implies that you understand what they are!" reasoned Sarasota, in a booming voice "And with that knowledge we can infer a knowledge of their operation, which is simple enough that we can judge a layperson aware of it!"

"Yeah you FUCKER," echoed Butch, now clambering over a low fence in chase of the child, "And because the human mind is a vast and varied echo chamber, whose vagaries can't be predicted and whose imagination is endless, we can conclude that one of your many juvenile imaginings is TAKING OUR GUNS!"

"So in the infinite multiverse theory, there exists a universe where this little SHIT got our guns?"

"Logically, that can only be the case" panted Butch

"HE'S GOT MY GUN!" Sarasota unloaded a full clip into the young child, whose organs dissolved in hydrostatic shock.

Sarasota and Butch were later made co-presidents of the United States of America.

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